Trying.

Its been so long since I have written anything on either of my blogs. I’ve been so messed up in my own life. All this while, I’ve just been trying to get all my shit together somehow. Just when I think I’ve sorted my life to some extent, there has to be something again to mess my world.

I’ve been graduated and out of college now. Feels sick to even think that I am now into the real world where everything is a struggle. I had already been placed in a company I just took a chance with, through college placements. I’d been in a long dilemma whether to join the corporate world or not to. Eventually, took my chance and joined it. Been a month working and turns out, I’m enjoying the work as of now and dealing with the stress and pressure I have. Been too much into work that I barely get time for myself and anyone else.

Except for work, I finally have someone I can call “My Man”. Dating someone would have been the last thing in my list until a few months ago where I met this guy, K. Never thought about him in a manner where I’ll fall for him in just one deep conversation. I did, eventually. It’s a long distance relationship and already difficult for the both of us. We know we love each other so much to manage the distance. It feels good yet it scares me the most. The only fear I have is losing people I am close to and the concept of relationship now scares me the most. Yet, I’m prepared. Lets see how it works out.

Also, I need to mend my relationship with family as well again and talk things out to remove half of my pain and stress. Hopefully, things will be positive soon and back on track.

U, came to Mumbai too and visited me. Felt so good to see him again after so long! I’ve missed him! Hoping to see him really soon again. šŸ™‚

Quite a lot of other things happened in these months which I don’t even remember now probably but it has been hell of a ride for me and I’m just occasionally breaking apart and trying to be normal again.

Constantly stuck between ” Why am I like this” and “I don’t Fucking care how I am; I’m awesome!”

I’m tired and irritated tonight. I’ll probably sleep in a bit.

Good night.

XOXO

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